Skip to main content

A Mother's Day Loveletter to Us

It’s 3:55 AM. I’m sitting in the dark — the gentle hum of the fridge in the background, a faint flicker of the WiFi light keeping me company, and the weight of a red pen in my hand.

I'm marking final assessments, wrapping up the semester, and slowly exhaling after a season of deadlines, diaper changes, class prep, grocery runs, toddler tantrums, presentations, feeds, flurries of emotions and having to say "Hi, my name is Tshenolo Mashaba" OUT LOUD so much more than I had anticipated! My eyes are tired, my back is stiff, but my heart is… full.

The semester has officially ended. I’ve passed my own modules — exceptionally, might I add. The kind of “exceptionally” that reminds me I’m not just surviving, I’m rising. I’m growing. I’m doing it — slowly, imperfectly, but powerfully. An Academic weapon as my co-mom/ sister/ lifeline labels it. 

And now, as I stare into the quiet stillness of my home, with my babies sleeping peacefully and my mind already shifting gears to exam prep, I feel something strange: a small pocket of space. A breath. Almost nothing to submit. No assignments looming. No research proposal hanging in the air. Just a moment to exist.

And in this moment — this rare, sacred in-between — I feel compelled to reach out. To stretch my hand through this screen and hold yours for just a minute.

To every mama reading this:

To the one who is trying so hard, she forgets when she last exhaled.
To the one whose love language is showing up, even when she’s running on fumes.
To the one who's been everything for everyone and is still wondering if she’s done enough.

Happy Mother’s Day.

Not the commercial kind. The real kind.
The kind where no one sees the invisible labor. The emotional logistics. The guilt. The grace. The magic. The madness.

You are doing sacred work.
Even when your hair’s unwashed and your to-do list is untouched.
Even when you whisper-yell “Can I just pee alone?”
Even when you wonder who you are outside of their needs.
Even when you forget what resting feels like.

I see you.
I am you.

And if this day feels bittersweet — if you miss a mother, mourn a dream, or move through a messy season — know this: you are not alone.

We are many.
We are mighty.
And we mother in ways that are loud and quiet, soft and strong, seen and unseen.

So here's to us.
To the mamas who are making it work.
To the ones redefining what strength looks like.
To the ones doing it scared, tired, unsure — but still showing up.

Let this be your reminder: 

You are not behind.
You are not failing.
You are exactly where you’re meant to be — smack in the middle of the sacred chaos of motherhood and becoming.

And you are doing a beautiful job.

May tomorrow bring coffee that’s still warm, hugs that linger, and a few minutes of silence to remember the you underneath the mama.

With all my love,
Tshenolo 🤍
Fellow night-shifter. Fellow dreamer. Fellow in-betweener.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Running on Fumes & Hope: A Mom’s Guide to Surviving the Busiest Week Ever

  At this point, I don’t even know how I’m still alive. It’s been one of those weeks—the kind that makes you question if time is real or if we’ve all just been living the same chaotic Monday on repeat. The clock just struck midnight on Friday morning and I'm not too sure whether to call it a night or aluta-continua? Both my kids are sick (because why wouldn’t they time their immune system meltdowns perfectly?), I have deadlines flying at me every 48 hours like heat-seeking missiles, and my daily classes are a blur of words that I think are English but might actually be gibberish at this point. My brain? Completely unresponsive. My body? Moving purely out of muscle memory. My spirit? Somewhere hovering over my body, watching the madness unfold like a reality show. The Art of Mom Survival Each morning, I wake up with a pep talk that sounds something like: You got this. You are strong. You are capable. And by 10 AM, I’m bargaining with the universe: Okay but what if I just lie d...

Balancing Motherhood and Career: Lessons from a Civil Engineer Mom

  Hey, lovely soul! 🌸 Welcome to my first post on The In-Betweens ! I thought there’d be no better way to kick things off than by diving into something that’s at the very heart of my life—balancing motherhood and career. If you’re anything like me, you know this balancing act feels more like a daily juggling show, with no shortage of dropped balls. But somehow, we keep it all in the air, right? For those of you meeting me for the first time, I’m Tshenolo—a mom to two little ones, a wife, and a civil engineer. Though I haven’t worked in the field since August 2022, I’ve transitioned to part-time lecturing, which means I spend most of my days at home. This shift came from a strong urge to be more available for my family while still staying connected to my passion for teaching and engineering. Between managing toddler tantrums, lecturing, and trying to sneak in some creativity through podcasting and video creation, I’ve learned a few things about how to keep my sanity intact while na...

The Art of Not Losing Your ****** Mind

If there were an award for surviving an impossibly hectic week without completely spiraling, I’d like to think I’d be in the running—barely, but still. Between academia, a five-month-old deciding that sleep is an optional luxury, and life demanding I show up in all the ways, I have had to pull from reserves I did not know existed. Academia in Overdrive: The Balancing Act Last week was academic chaos. Between in-person lectures, assignments, tests and trying to wrap my head around coursework that refuses to be simple, I found myself drowning in readings and deadlines while also attempting to function as a sane human being. Spoiler: The sane part? Questionable. There were moments when I stared blankly at my laptop screen, willing it to magically complete my work for me. And when that didn’t happen (because, obviously), I had to power through—often with a baby strapped to my chest because, of course, he decided this was the perfect time to stage a sleep rebellion. Sleep Regression: Th...